One this that I’m amazed that is a constant part of our
culture is how other women belittle the other women around them. I mentioned in
class my friend that posted on Facebook about how much he hated the view and we
talked about how that attitude is usually because for some reason if you are
emotional you are somehow stupid. Higher emotion is also something that is
associated with femininity. That alone has so many issues to unpack alone, but
part of the thread that really made me think was the comments that were made to
the original post. My friend who made the original post is male and he had
something alone the lines of he watched The View and was reminded why he doesn’t
watch shows like that. His friend, who is female, said that is why she isn’t
friends with girls. How can we as women ever expect to gain respect if we
demean each other? She basically was saying that most females aren’t worth knowing;
however she didn’t include herself in that category. If women are always going
to say that other women are bad and that it’s better to be with men, there will
always be attitudes that reflect poorly on women. If you took her comment at
face value she was essentially not worth being friends with. She is a girl and
if girls make bad friends, than she makes bad friends. I think this is a key
example that highlights the bad thoughts about women that are prevalent in our
society. I think it’s a big problem.
Jill, it bothers me so much when girls say "that's why I'm not friends with girls"...it is so hypocritical and judgmental. I feel like girls say this for the attention, perhaps they feel as if they bash other females, then guys will be more compelled to hang out with them. Whatever the reason, it's ignorant and hurtful. I feel bad for people who choose to take such broad stands against whole genders, races, etc. I don't think they have any idea just how much they're closing themselves off from a whole world of opportunity to meet some really unique and inspiring people.
ReplyDeleteI recently read a book, "One is the Sun", by Patricia Nell Warren, which elaborates on possible reasons as to why in the past (like a century and a half ago) women felt the need to compete with each other and make enemies out of all other women. The book says that this behavior was probably due to the fact that back then, women had to rely of men for much more (i.e. shelter, food, protection) so they felt like they had to "war with other women" in an effort to secure a man, and therefore a future. This book is historical fiction...so I'm not saying this evaluation is absolutely correct, but it does seem to make sense to me. What puzzles me though, is why in our modern society, women still feel the need to exhibit this malicious behavior? I think the best way to remedy this is to confront women who feel the need to belittle each other, and ask them what specifically they have against said persons, and ask them why they feel the need to belittle them.